Thursday, June 28, 2012

in a season of waiting

that's my season of life right now.
not something i am fond of, my flesh fails me. every. single. time.
darn it. 
every time i grow inpatient. often times going to the worst case scenario in my mind.
are you with me? tell me i am not the only one who does this. 

maybe the next time i hear "what would you change about yourself if you could?"
that should be my answer. 
i need more patience, i need more rational thoughts in "the waiting".
there are some women who i perceive to be the most graceful "waiters",
if that is even a word. they face trials of all kinds and honey drips from their lips.
the embody cool, calm, collected personas.
me, oh no, this is where my flesh fails me.
i get snippy, i try to do a 1000 things to keep my mind busy.
it's not pretty.

my life has had lots of times where i just had to wait.
sit on the edge of what God was doing. clueless.
my parents divorce, my moms cancer, losing our home as children,
heartbreak, loss, parenting journey's, job insecurity, and more.
you name it. time spent, waiting.
waiting for "the call", "the letter in the mail", the diagnosis.

most of the time, i am a happy, energetic and positive person.
however, during these seasons of "waiting", shamefully i admit, not so much. 
too many hours of sleep are given to worry.
and not enough are given to prayer.

but you know what amazes me each, and every time.
God's strength is made perfect in my weakness.

time and time again He has demonstrated for me that i am in the palm of his hand.
nothing i face is greater than what he has over come.
"take heart, i have overcome the world"
john 16:33

you hear that my friends, the world!
he has over come the world!!!!!!

death, divorce, illness, financial woes, relationships,
He has over come it.

He didn't just "get through it".
He didn't "survive it"

no, my friends, he OVERCAME it.

so right now, i am going to make a choice,
i will be still.
i will know He is God.
 and i will find my peace in the knowledge that

what are you facing today?
whatever it is... it isn't too big for Him.
and for that I am eternally grateful.

so, miss snippy attitude, take a back seat.
He's got this.

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